Don't Save Second Base, Save Women

The search for a breast cancer cure has become the popular cause that people and businesses like to support. I'm not saying that this isn't a good cause, not at all, just pointing out a fact. So with the support of businesses and organizations everywhere, breast cancer is constantly visible. Pink ribbons. Pink tops on Yoplait yogurt containers. Pink anything that says "find a cure!" (And no, I'm not going to get into the gendered color-coding going on here.) 

I saw the breast cancer cause recently on someone's T-shirt. I was on campus at my college (former college, I should say, take that undergraduate school!) for a talk and the girl walking in front of me was wearing a T-shirt that looked suspiciously like one for a sorority event. The event clearly donated some or all proceeds to breast cancer research, and as I got closer I read the slogan:

Save second base. 

It took me a second to figure out what this (yes, pink) T-shirt was saying. And when I did, I was a little grossed out. Not grossed out by the sexual implications of the slogan, but grossed out by the social implications of it. This is how we must gather support for breast cancer research? By sexualizing the cancer's victim?

I guess I shouldn't be surprised.

Women everywhere are sexualized. Women who enjoy sex are seen as sluts to enjoy and discard. Women who have not had sex are seen as a landscape to conquer. Young women are seen as hot bundles of energy; older women are seen as cougars on the prowl. Why not sexualize women suffering from breast cancer?

Once again, we are looking at a woman by way of her parts. No one is talking about the whole woman suffering from cancer. No one is talking about the family of the woman suffering along with her. No one is talking about the effects of chemotherapy and/or radiation devastating her in order to save her. No one is talking about the fear and doubt that she lives with, day in and day out, as her body betrays her. No... everyone is talking about boobs. Because, let's not forget, boobs are what make a woman, and what make a woman attractive. Boobs are what men see. Boobs are what women want, or, if they have "good" ones, what make women proud of themselves. Right?

Wrong. Well, wrong and right. Because, yes, men do look at women's boobs. And yes, women with smaller boobs often want them, and many women with larger breasts are proud of them. But this is because our society, obsessed with the female body and the "ideal" beauty, has told us that breasts are a huge part of what makes a woman attractive. And society has told us that women, above all else, need to be attractive. It's their job. If you aren't attractive enough, work on it. Make-up. The right clothes. High heels. Hair products. The list is endless. And if you are attractive, you should be proud of it. If you got it, flaunt it, amiriteladies? (It should be noted that this philosophy does not apply to other qualities women might have, like compassion, humor, or intelligence; I've corrected the grammar of enough people to know that this particular skill of mine is not appreciated when flaunted.) So, with this line of thinking, the T-shirt makes sense: Breast cancer is bad because it takes away breasts, which are totally awesome and totally necessary to make a person a woman, and totally necessary for sexual interaction.

Now, I'm not saying that women who have lost their breasts to cancer don't deserve to grieve for that loss. Of course they do. They have lost a body part. They have lost a part of themselves that they've never been without (in some form or other). A disease has changed their bodies forever, and they had no control over it. They have every right to grieve. 

But these women are still women. And many of these women are women who will live longer because they had to get rid of "second base." And these women can (and do) still have sex lives. And work lives. And family lives. Because they are full, rich, human beings. Because they are still women, with or without natural boobs. 

Many women lose their lives to breast cancer. They lose their attractiveness and their breasts, of course, but they also lose an entire life. Work life. Family life. Plans and goals. An entire life can be lost to breast cancer.

So let's stop campaigning to "save the ta-tas" and "save second base" and start campaigning to save women. 

It's All About the Dress... Sadly

I was driving in my car today and someone on the radio mentioned a Best Dressed List (with Harry Potter’s Emma Watson on it) and a Worst Dressed List (with Lady GaGa on it). I was suddenly so insulted. Why are we putting women on lists like these? These women are professional, working women. They are trying to have careers doing what they enjoy, and part of that career involves being front and center in public all the time. But just because they are constantly photographed does not give anyone the right to consider them dehumanized bodies that can be constantly criticized and insulted.

Think of a night like the Oscars. This is a huge night for the movie industry. Whatever else you might think of the Oscars, it is supposed to be a night of celebration and honor. This is a night for the work of filmmakers to be appreciated, praised and honored. Filmmakers put a lot of work into their films; many films occupy the entire lives of filmmakers for months or years. The Oscars is a night about work and art.

But what is it really about? According to the media, when it comes to the women of the industry, it’s about the dress. It’s about looking glamorous. It’s about which woman is playing up the Cinderella story the best. It’s about a critique of bodies. I looked up the Best Dressed List for this year's Oscars. The four best-dressed women were written to be “the real winners” of this year. According to this website, a real winner is a well-dressed woman. The winners of awards for their work, for their art, are somehow less important than the women who managed to show up on the red carpet looking wonderfully feminine and beautiful. Could this be any more demeaning and insulting to these women?

I was even more insulted by the write-up given to Jennifer Lawrence, the actress who has received much praise for her performance in Winter’s Bone. “Not a lot of people were familiar with blonde bombshell Jennifer Lawrence before she showed up to the red carpet at the Oscars wearing a sexy red Calvin Klein gown. It’s safe to say Oscar nominee got the attention of a lot of men and is now a household name. Congrats Jennifer, all it took was a sexy red gown!” This site makes it sound like the only reason people know that Jennifer exists is because she looked great at the ceremony. Nothing about the performance that landed her that Oscar nomination. Nothing about the film in which she performed.

It’s time for people in our society to stop accepting this kind of treatment of women. As long as we don’t say anything, as long as we don’t complain, as long as we just take it for granted as the way things are, we are complicit. We are a part of this culture unless we speak out against it.

At the top of this best-dressed page is the statement, “Award shows may come and go, but the fashion is forever!” First of all, I just have to laugh at the stupidity of this sentence. Fashion is just as, if not more, fleeting as award shows. At least the night’s winners will see their awards from time to time; the dresses will disappear and never be worn again. But underneath this statement, again, is the message that the way these woman look is more important, and more lasting, than the work they do.