The Girl with...No Clothes?

So far, I am not excited about the English-speaking version of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. I loved loved loved the book series, and saw the first Swedish film adaptation of it. I loved the film. I was amazed with the amount of violence they were able to show without being too gruesome (basically, the book was very violent, and while I was afraid of having to see some of the violence, I also knew that censoring it would damage the story). And I loved the way the filmmakers dealt with the character of Lisbeth Salander.

Lisbeth is not necessarily a feminist character. While very tough, she's always described as looking like a young boy instead of a woman, and the books imply that she ultimately needs (male) Mikael to come to her rescue and save her from herself (what can I say? the books aren't perfect). But even so, she is a strong woman who has survived abuse and adapted. She is incredibly (ridiculously, actually) intelligent, and she uses it to her advantage. She can fight. And she's a sort of vigilante character: doing good for good's sake but doing it outside of the law. Who doesn't love that kind of character? (Batman, hello!)

So why does the English-speaking version seem to be turning her into a sex symbol?

Check out this poster for the film. She's naked!!! Totally unnecessary. Also, what's with Daniel Craig's creepy hold on her? Does he own her? Is he 'protecting' her? Lisbeth is a sexual character in the book; in fact, her lack of inhibitions along with her willingness to seek love (and her own pleasure) from whomever she chooses is admirable. But she is not, as this poster implies, a sex object.

And yet, with this being the English-speaking, Blockbuster-intended version, somehow I'm not surprised. Our culture objectifies women. Period. You want a strong female character at the center of your film? Great. But she's gotta be naked.

Also, the tagline bothers me. "Evil Shall With Evil Be Expelled." We're calling Lisbeth evil now? What are her "evil" characteristics exactly? Independence. Strength. Lack of nurturing "feminine" characteristics. Stubbornness. Extraordinary intelligence. Perseverance. Asocial tendencies. Tattoos. Piercings. Survival skills. Instinct.

Yeah, evil. She probably sold her soul to the devil. (And the devil is, as far as Hollywood's concerned, an uncompromising sense of self.)

Dear Hollywood,
 Can you please take a strong female character and portray her admirably, even when she doesn't fit into society's narrow feminine mold? Oh, and can you do this with her clothes on?


Thanks,
Genie

Why You Should Read Feminist Magazines

I am falling in love with magazines. More specifically, feminist magazines.

As evidenced by several of my posts, I love Bitch magazine. I discovered it while working on a paper for a feminism class, and ordered several back issues to analyze. The feminist take on pop culture topics won me over immediately. Now I have a subscription, with a plan to buy one or two back issues each month to build up my collection.

Recently, I also subscribed to Bust magazine and my first issue arrived today. Already in love! Even though I may never use it, I'm really excited it by the Do It Yourself section that provides you with easy, cheap crafts (in this issue: make a fabric necklace out of old T-shirts!). I've also been introduced to cool new feminist organizations that I want to support (Buy Her Bag Not Her Body is an organization that gives Cambodian women jobs to keep them out of sex trafficking). I've discovered two new musicians (new to me at least; I tend to be behind the times). I can't wait for more.

I also enjoy the blogs on Ms. magazine's website. I haven't subscribed yet, but I have a feeling it will be my next (unless someone has another feminist magazine suggestion?).

What I love so much about feminist magazines is the feeling of understanding and community. Yes it's cheesy but it's also true. When I read Cosmo, I feel left out. I don't want to use the make-up or buy the clothes (and don't have the money to do so anyway) and I certainly don't want to take the shoddy relationship advice. But these feminists mags that I love provide me with a group of people who think like I do, who read what I read, and who are concerned about more than appearance and "pleasing their men."

So for anyone who has flipped through a traditional women's magazine and felt left out, ignored, or looked down upon, check out a feminist mag instead! They're really awesome, and they are helping me discover what I want to do with the rest of my life (... work for a feminist magazine; thought I'd spell it out just in case).

Does Virginity Exist?

It seems like a ridiculous question, right? We all know virginity exists because we have all been told to hang on to it until marriage (at least, all us women have). But how can you define virginity?

Jessica Valenti points put in her book, The Purity Myth, that there is not a single, standard, medical definition for virginity. Not one. So how can we go about hanging on to and protecting something that we can't define?

Think about it for a second. How do you define sex? Do you only count heterosexual intercourse? Do you count oral? Do you count an experience in which you didn't have an orgasm? If we can't even settle on what counts as "sex," how can we say when we have had sex for the first time and, therefore, lost our virginity?

Valenti's book is great because it provides a whole new way for thinking about sex and sexuality. She mentions a friend of hers who only labels an experience as "sex" if she has had an orgasm. This blew my mind. It doesn't focus on mechanics; it focuses on pleasure. And one experience could count as sex for one partner and not the other. So what? We all know that not everyone gets off at the same time or even in the same night, but why does it matter? By thinking of sex as something that culminates in pleasure, we can change our entire attitudes about sex entirely.

And even better, we could begin to eliminate the gray area that some people seem to find between sex and rape. We could live in a world in which sex for everyone is a comfortable, fun activity to be enjoyed when desired (for all people). And we could live in a society in which virginity didn't have to be hoarded and saved, but instead, one in which sex was a series of activities and experiences to be explored at one's own pace.

I would very much enjoy this world.

Abstain From Abstinence-Only Education!!

I was aware before the past few days that a lot of sex education in our country is really just abstinence-only education, but until I started reading a new book, I was completely unaware of the horrible misconceptions (as well as outright lies) about sex that abstinence-only education is spreading.

In the book The Purity Myth: How America's Obsession with Virginity is Hurting Young Women, Jessica Valenti explores many aspects of sexuality and how it is presented to women and young girls. She discusses the idea that virginity doesn't exist (a very intriguing idea, more on this later), and the virginity movement that's gaining popularity in this country which asks young girls to pledge their virginities (often done as a pledge to their fathers, who then take control and protection over their virginity until the time comes to pass that job on to their husbands). But what I found most interesting tonight was the chapter on abstinence-only education.

Abstinence-only education not only prohibits any positive discussion of contraceptives, it also grossly exaggerates contraception failure rates and tells children that contraceptions can harm or even kill you. (Yes, kill.) These educational classes teach children that sex is a shameful and dirty act that will ruin your life. They teach that men have natural, uncontrollable sex drives which women have to control (because, you know, men have no control over their own bodies and actions, and women have no sexual desire of their own). They teach that a woman who has lost her virginity before marriage is now 'damaged goods' (yes, still talking about women in terms of property!). Do they mention alternative ways for teens to deal with their growing desires, such as masturbation? No! Do they mention that sex can be pleasurable or intimate or an active, consensual choice? Of course not! That might get those kids thinking that sex is good.

Oh, there's one other thing that abstinence-only education does. It fails. There is NO evidence that children taught abstinence-only are less likely to have sex; in fact, the only thing they are less likely to do is use protection when they are having sex. Abstinence-only education is sending confusing messages (Sex is bad!...Until you're married. Then it's suddenly good! But only if you make babies!) and then putting teens out into the world without any knowledge of their bodies, their desires or how to protect themselves.

I personally feel like a victim of this system, and I don't even recall sitting through an abstinence-only class (though I might have; I know I don't remember anything from health class). As embarrassing as it is, I was not aware that women did, or really even could, masturbate (I didn't think about it much, but again, that's because no one ever talked to me about it). I'm not kidding. This is a huge part of sexuality that I was completely unaware of. Also, until I entered into my first relationship at the age of 21, I still somewhat believed the myths that women don't really want to have sex that much; it's just something that they do for men, who want it all the time. I was completely disconnected from any desires I might have, because I had been taught that girls simply don't have desire. Luckily, I haven't ended up pregnant or sick because of my lack of sexual education, but many teens do. And I still feel angry about all the years I spent thinking that my body was something from which my mind should always be detached, and that sex was a dirty, painful thing that I would one day be stuck dealing with.

The most disturbing part to me (it's hard to actually choose a most disturbing part out of all of this, but this is mine for the moment) is that this education is federally funded. Federal dollars are going toward teaching teenagers lies, actual lies, about their bodies and their desires. The governing body of this country is supporting programs that misrepresent medical facts. This is what we need to abstain from.

Always a Girl, Never a Woman

Today at work, I was embarrassed by an older man. He is working on a book that our company is going to publish in the near future and he was dropping off a couple of chapters for my boss, the head publisher. My boss introduced me to the man, we’ll call him Mr. Roberts. He told Mr. Roberts who my parents are (I live in a small town and, while it’s getting bigger, I am still plagued by the older generations who know my parents and grandparents all too well) and Mr. Roberts seemed genuinely excited to meet me.

“Well, look at this, we got a third-generation one right here.” (Third generation what? Your guess is as good as mine.) “You look just like Elizabeth,” (my grandmother on my dad’s side, not necessarily a compliment) “and you sure are pretty.” At this point, I’ve been embarrassed by being connected to my older family members (though, granted, I understand that it’s a small town and people like making these connections) and I’ve been reduced to my appearance. Bad enough, right? No. Because the next thing he did was to reach out…

…and pat me on the head!

I am not kidding or exaggerating. Patted. Me. On. The. Head.

Yes, I understand that he’s about seventy years old and that he knows my grandparents and probably sees me as a “youngun.” I get all that. And I still say…

Seriously??!?!

I am 23 years old. He was not meeting me through my grandparents or in a social setting. We were in a professional situation. When he walked in, I stuck out my hand to give my best professional handshake, complete with eye contact and a firm grip. He entered my office and I was introduced to him as “a great intern” and “a wonderful proofreader” (props to my boss for picking out attributes related to intelligence and skill!). I will probably be proofreading his very book in a few weeks and telling him how to fix his writing. And yet he still treated me like 1) a pretty face and 2) a small child. And, sadly, he probably thought he was being truly complimentary and appropriate.

Sexism makes me tired. If I were a male intern of the same age and with the same family connections, he would never have patted me so condescendingly. Today was yet another reminder that no matter how professional, hard-working, or intelligent a woman is, many men (and women too) will see her as a perpetual little girl.